Yesterday, as I ended a very positive videocall, I suddenly felt spent and discouraged. As simply Constituent Cory, I’d been speaking with my congressperson’s staffer for foreign affairs issues. World Vision has a wonderful program for volunteers to have meaningful dialog with their congressional representatives and senators on issues critical to our poorest global neighbors. This was my first meeting and, unlike in other districts, I’m the only current volunteer in my district, so I did this solo.

It went very well. Rep. Sarah Jacobs is a keen proponent for the strategic investment value of foreign assistance, having seen its efficacy firsthand as a former UNICEF staff person. In fact, she was in charge of a portion of UNICEF’s Innovation Unit at a time when I was driving World Vision’s Innovation Fund and sharing learnings with the innovation director at UNICEF! And her staffer spent four years on Africa issues at the State Department, including living in Ethiopia for several months. He has even been to Afar and the town in the middle of that vast province where World Vision’s program had operated. So we hit it off well.

But immediately after signing off the call, I felt a deep sense of impotence. After all my pre-meeting prep and then a solid dialog, I felt I had done nothing that made any difference, and that there was virtually nothing I could do. Before sending any follow-up info, I had to drop to my knees and pray, then journal. With millions of lives hanging in the balance with the current cuts in US government funding, I wrote:

I put my single oar in the water. I did my push. I was prepared. I did a good job. So what? Does anything change in the halls of power? No.

I know, I know…

• What if 1000 oarsmen push their oars 10,000 times? It can move a mighty Viking warship. 
• I am called to be faithful, not successful. Be faithful in and out of season, and it’s certainly out of season right now…

I comforted myself that my fellow Volunteer Advocates had already posted in our Facebook group celebrating 40-50 other meetings this past month with their congressional offices. I reminded myself that I am only one workman, and only God is the Master Builder who can know the end from the beginning. I concluded with this…

That’s the role of the Master Builder, not the laborer. I’m a laborer. I’d like to find joy and satisfaction in the labor, or in the progress being made in the building. This I don’t see. Not yet. I do have faith that I will see it at some point. But maybe not. That will be a gracious gift from God, but not something I can demand or even expect. The question is: Will I be faithful?

I do recognize that I’ve been down this road before, struggled with these feelings before, and seen progress and God’s favor over time. The boat does move. Faithfulness is its own reward, but there are also other rewards. I’ve seen that many times when working on seemingly insurmountable, intractable Kingdom issues.

In some ways I’m feeling like Elijah did after he’d poured himself out, then ran for his life and collapsed, exhausted, spent, discouraged.  Lord, I’d appreciate an angel bringing me bread and water to revive and nourish me. Amen.

Then this morning I read the stunning news that “The United States is embarking on a review of its previously completed review of USAID programming. Is that bad or good news for those who did (or didn’t) make the cut?”

After announcing the cancellation of more than 80% of USAID programs, including over half of its grants to World Vision, there will be yet another review of that review. Sure, this could mean more bad news for the most vulnerable, or it could be something God could use to reinstate some of the life-saving programs that have been cut. Several thousand outstanding former colleagues of mine in these places have already been furloughed for lack of funds to pay for the projects they’ve been implementing. Could their efforts be raised up again from the dust?

Could our combined voices and efforts be making some difference? Could they yet make a difference? I have renewed hope on this Resurrection Day weekend that perhaps more programs can rise from their early graves. We of all people know the possibility of that hope.

Would you join me in praying for this?

And as someone who cares about our most vulnerable global neighbors, especially the children, would you consider joining me as a Volunteer Advocate, using your voice for this effort for the Kingdom of God, a place where “those who had much did not have too much and those who had too little did not have too little?” [see 2CO8:15, EX16:18]

It’s Friday, but Sunday’s comin’!

Cory

April 2025